How to Go to Confession: A Practical Guide to Confession

Confession in the Catholic Church involves acknowledging one’s sins before God, through a priest, in order to receive His forgiveness. Many people wonder: “What should I say? Will I forget something?” or “I haven’t gone to confession in a long time—how do I do it?”

In practice, confession takes place in a few steps: examination of conscience, confession of sins, the act of contrition, and absolution. If you’re wondering how to go to confession, this guide explains each step in simple terms.

Before going to confession, it’s essential to take some time to be honest with God. This is called an examination of conscience.

Here are two simple ways to do this:

• based on your relationship with God, others, and yourself
• based on the Ten Commandments

Good to Know: These two methods complement each other and help you better reflect on your life before God. Your examination of conscience doesn’t have to be perfect. It simply serves to prepare your heart.

Conducting an examination of conscience based on your relationship with God, others, and yourself

My Relationship with God

• Is God truly at the center of my life? 
• Do I pray regularly? 
• Do I trust God in my decisions? 
• Do I live out my faith openly or with fear? 

My Relationship with Others

• Have I hurt, judged, looked down on, or slandered anyone?
• Do I engage in gossip?
• Do I forgive easily?
• Do I care for others, or do I neglect them?
• Do I use others to further my own agenda? Am I chaste in my relationships?

My Relationship with Myself

• Am I proud?
• Am I lazy or careless?
• Do I take care of my health?
• Do I indulge in excesses (screen time, food, alcohol, gambling, drugs, etc.)?
• Do I respect my dignity?

Examining Your Conscience Based on the Ten Commandments

The Ten Commandments are another way to conduct a more thorough examination of conscience. They can be found in the second section of the third part of the Catechism of the Catholic Church.

1st Commandment: I am the Lord your God. You shall have no other gods

• Is God first in my life?
• Do I trust Him and seek to do His will?
• Do I pray regularly, or only during difficult times?
• Do I allow myself to be led astray by “idols” (superstition, horoscopes, fortune-telling, spiritualism, etc.)?

2nd Commandment: You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain

• Do I respect God in my words?
• Have I shown disrespect toward God or holy things through mockery or carelessness?
• Do I criticize the Church? 

3rd Commandment: You shall keep the Lord’s Day holy

• What place does Mass hold in my life?
• Do I attend Mass on Sundays, and do I observe Sunday rest?
• Do I truly grasp the significance of the Eucharist when I receive Communion?
• Does Mass influence the way I live my life? 

4th Commandment: Honor your father and your mother

• What is my relationship with my parents like, and do I stay in regular contact with them?
• Do I help them in their daily lives? Do I contribute to peace within the family?
• Do I pray for them? 

5th Commandment: You shall not kill

• Have I endangered my own life or health—or that of others—or hurt someone with my words or actions? 
• Have I encouraged harmful behaviors (such as abortion, alcohol abuse, or drug use)?

6th Commandment: You shall not commit adultery

• Have I sought sexual stimulation (pornography, images, or other forms) or committed acts contrary to chastity, alone or with others?
• Have I lived out fidelity and respect for my spouse in our mutual self-giving, or have I been unfaithful to my marital commitment?

7th Commandment: You shall not steal

• Have I stolen, kept, or misused property that does not belong to me?
• Do I exhibit greed, envy, or excessive spending?
• Have I ever committed fraud (particularly regarding taxes)?

8th Commandment: You shall not bear false witness

• Do I speak of others with respect and kindness, without disparaging, judging, or slandering them?
• Have I ever lied, disparaged, or deceived someone for my own gain?
• Have I tried to make myself seem better or more important than I really am?
• Do I respect the secrets entrusted to me by others?
• Do I keep my promises?

9th Commandment: You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife

• How do I conduct myself in my marital life, whether before or outside of marriage?
• Do I respect the dignity of people of the opposite sex, without contempt or lust?
• Do I strive to love others as I would like to be loved?

10th Commandment: You shall not covet your neighbor’s possessions

• What is my attitude toward the possessions and property of others?
• Am I able to resist my desires, without jealousy, pride, or excessive ambition?
• Do I show generosity and go above and beyond, or do I seek to assert myself or be the center of attention? 

How does confession work?

Confession follows a simple process. Discover the steps.

Entering the Confessional

After the priest’s greeting and blessing, the penitent may be invited to begin confession. The penitent may, if they wish, start by reading a verse or a passage from the Bible, or by giving thanks to the Lord, before confessing their sins. They may also tell the priest the date of their last confession, as the priest will handle the situation differently depending on whether the confession is regular (for example, monthly) or has not taken place for a long time (for example, ten years).

The penitent confesses their sins

The penitent confesses their sins to the priest with contrition. The goal is to clearly state what one has done, with sufficient precision so that the confessor can understand the nature of the sin. It is not necessary to go into every detail or to recount the entire story. The essential thing is to name one’s faults with humility, sincerity, and truth, without minimizing or exaggerating them.

At the end of the confession of sins, the priest may ask the penitent if there is anything else to add and, if so, offer some spiritual guidance.

The penitent recites the Act of Contrition

If the penitent has not recited the Act of Contrition after confessing their sins, the priest may invite them to do so.

There are several possible acts of contrition, such as:

“My God,

I deeply regret having offended You,

because You are infinitely good,

infinitely loving,

and sin displeases You;

I firmly resolve,

with the help of your holy grace,

to sin against You no more and to do penance."

The priest grants God’s forgiveness (Absolution)

After reciting the Act of Contrition, the priest grants absolution. There are several formulas. The best known is probably this one:

“May God our Father show you His mercy! Through the death and Resurrection of His Son, He has reconciled the world to Himself and has sent the Holy Spirit for the forgiveness of sins; through the ministry of the Church, may He grant you forgiveness and peace.”

Good to know: In some cases, the priest may delay or withhold absolution, particularly if the penitent does not show sincere regret or has no intention of converting. This is rare, however, as most people approach the sacrament with a genuine spirit of conversion and repentance.

The priest may suggest a penance or an act of reparation

After granting absolution, the priest may suggest a penance or an act of reparation to the penitent, whether or not it is directly related to the sins confessed.

With Hozana, rediscover God’s mercy!

With Hozana, let’s deepen our appreciation for the sacraments and rediscover God’s mercy through the Sacrament of Reconciliation.

Discover God’s love with communities such as:

• This community to help you draw closer to God’s mercy
• Novenas or retreats on the same theme.